Saccha Jhut

What do you call a movie about honest hair insects?

True Lice.

Let's have a Chaat

What do you call fat Delhi-ites who gossip (chat) a lot over paani-puri (chaat)?



What do you call a Red Indian elephant?

~ celibacy incarnate

Rhino the Whino

Himesh Reshammiya Nose All.


What do you call a music group made up of fat internet technicians?


It's all Greek to me

What do Greeks say when they see a thunderstorm?

Greece Lightning.

Credit: Celibacy Incarnate

Run Forrest, Run!

Two friends are talking over the telephone:

Friend 1: Hey, guess what! I just joined a gym! Really need to work out now

Friend 2: Yeah, I'm not a big gym fan, I prefer running.

Friend 1: How often do you run?

Friend 2: Everyday. I'm running right now in fact!

Friend 1: Really?

Friend 2: Yes. Late. Bye.


Up the wrong tree

You know what the problem is with India's nuclear programme?

It's barc is worse than its bite.

Credit: Celibacy Incarnate

Geriatrix de La Rosa

What do you call old people from Portugal?



What do you call a Mumbai constable who cracks really bad jokes?



What will the Hindi version of Pirates of the Caribbean - Dead Man's Chest be called?

Pirates of the Caribbean - Dil Chahta Hai

Note: If you didn't get it, go see the movie you lazy fool.


If two Biryanis are having a fight, and one is losing terribly, then what will he have to do to make it an even contest?

He'll have to rice to the occasion.

Fat Bastards

What do you call an offensive tool created just to destroy all the fat in an obese person's body?

A weapon of mass-destruction.

Credit: Hatori Hansome


What do you say about somebody who's running around, here, there and everywhere, making fun of everyone and everything?

He's running a-mock!


How do you encourage a fat girl to have patience?




Oh sorry, their play made me fall asleep in the middle of the cheer.


Two friends are talking to each other at a dull party.

Friend #1: This party is boring, there's absolutely nothing happening!

Friend #2: You're right, cabbage leave.

Friend #1: What?

Friend #2: Cabbage leave!

Friend #1: Huh?

Friend #2: Oh sorry, lettuce leave.


Leo is a lying, stealing Bastard. Any claim he has over the Paris joke is entirely fabricated.


The only original thing he's ever come up with is "Duuuude, man".

Hand me a tree

What kind of tree fits in your hand?

A Palm Tree.


What do you say to a Indian in Mexico who dances while eating food?

What is he eating/dancing?



If you don't give a flying fuck AND a rat's ass, does that mean you don't give a flying rat's fucking ass?

Does that mean you don't give a sodomising bat?


What do you call people who use a Macintosh in Israel?

Apple Jews

Ahh Paris!

If people from Bombay are called Bombayites, what are people from Paris called?


Unholy Cows

If a cow commits blasphemy, heresy even. If it does something so terrible that it warrants religious persecution, then what would the nearby villagers do?

Burn the steak at a stake.

Breaking Up

If you don't know how to break up with someone, if you're really bad at moving on, what kind of spiritual course would help you?

The Art of Leaving.